Food delivery guys suck balls. They have sucked balls on Day 1 and they continue to suck balls everyday since. I have experienced Food Delivery with multiple services and they almost always suck. In India it was Zomato & Uber, In Thailand it is Grab & FoodPanda. These “riders” make an otherwise enjoyable experience unpleasant.
What I Expect
- I choose what I want to eat and from where, I make the payment and place the order.
- The order magically appears on my doorstep after a reasonable amount of time.
- I enjoy my meal in peace.
Those who fulfill the above get a juicy tip and a nice rating.
What I get
- Calling me to ask if my order is confirmed. This is very common in Bangkok. You retard, if my order wasn’t confirmed, did I place it (and also paid for it) for shits and giggles? Even if I did, since I have paid for my order, your job is to bring it and not question my judgement.
- Calling me to tell me he is bringing my order. This was very common in India. I don’t need you to tell me you are bringing my order. I can see the status on the app.
- Calling me to ask my address. Asshole, my address is in my order. Secondly, I have also set my GPS co-ordinates to make things even easier for your retard self.
- Calling me to ask for directions. Use the navigation app on your Realme/Redmi phone instead of expecting me to ask you where you are and then give you turn-by-turn directions. I see many delivery guys and cab drivers as well who seem allergic to using the maps app on their Realme/Redmi/Vivo phones.
- Calling me from outside my door to tell me they have arrived. Never heard of a thing called a doorbell? If not, just keep the order in front of the door and get the fuck lost.
- Riding like maniacs on their ear-splitting mopeds. This one I write as a pedestrian/fellow driver, not as a customer. I think this is partly their fault & partly a result of the unrealistic expectations placed on them by their companies.
Most of these retards actually think they are doing good service by going the extra mile and calling me repeatedly. I understand that these people are underpaid and unskilled but it doesn’t require skill to use the food delivery app and the navigation app (which hopefully they are trained in).
Can’t wait for Drones to take over this job in the future.
2 thoughts on “Food Delivery Guys Suck Balls”
I have very rarely experienced all these things here in Bangalore, be it Zomato, Swiggy or the erstwhile Uber Eats. It’s contact-less (that means no calling too) every single time, whatever be the time of the day. Thanks to COVID, they now just drop the package at the security gate and take off and one can pick up the food at convenience. They just assume you’re tracking them online.
E-commerce seems to be operating much better here considering your poor experience with online shopping apps as well.
Yaar must be a North Indian thing.