Tag Archives: Escitalopram

Anxiety Medication Fail (Yet Again)

One thing that you should know about me is that I don’t seem to be able to learn a lesson. I am writing this just a few weeks after my latest anxiety medication fail.

So, I had a good thing going on with my medications, no problems, good productivity, happy in life. But, I started looking for ways to cheap out. I found a pharmacy which would provide me cheaper versions of the medications I currently take from my hospital.

MedicationBeforeAfter
Escitalopram 10mg (Half Dose)LexaproEsidep
Risperidone 1mg (Half Dose)NeurisRisperidone GPO
Before and after medication

Basically I replaced my expensive medication with cheaper versions, with supposedly the exact same chemical composition, but at 1/4th the price. What could go wrong?

Lots.

Turns out, all medication are not created equal, even if the box says so.

The first night I switched meds, I had awful sleep and woke up the next morning with an altered mental state. I had a work-related argument the night before, so I thought it was related to that.

The second night, too, I slept awful. At this point, I started suspecting the meds, but decided to give it another try.

Luckily, I still had some of my old medication left. So I decided to do a series of experiments

  1. Third night I rolled back Escitalopram to Lexapro – No Joy
  2. Fourth night I rolled back both medications – Much joy
  3. Fifth & Sixth night, I did Esidep + Neuris – Much joy

Hence, I identified that the Risperidone generic version is no good. The next day, I went to the doctor and got my regular medication.

Anxiety Medication Withdrawal Fail
The Culprit

Anxiety Medication Withdrawal Fail-2

To continue the series of posts about my battle with anxiety, I bring the latest medication withdrawal fail story.

As I wrote here, after my last misadventure with SSRIs, I stopped taking them altogether. Since I felt fine for the next few weeks, I assumed that I don’t really need them and forgot all about them since.

PC: Verywellmind

However, ever so slowly, my anxiety started to creep up back on me. There weren’t any drastic symptoms. Just things like worrying too much about work, thinking about work at night or during weekends. Also, the ever present feeling of dread that something will eventually go wrong.

I was very proud of myself for having successfully(?) given up this medication and wanted to prevent another medication withdrawal fails. So I decided to continue without it.

After I spent 3 successive weekends obsessing over work and dreading Monday, I decided I would keep my mind open about resuming the medicine and gave myself 1 month to decide, till my next doctor appointment. I didn’t last 1 month.

Last weekend, after dreading work all Saturday and most of Sunday, I decided to give up and go back on the medication there and then. I called the hospital & requested to see the doctor the same day. Thankfully they were able to put me on the waiting list and I saw the doctor within the hour. He took pity on me and put me back on Lexapro.

After bagging the medication, I immediately felt better. The world looked brighter and life seemed more beautiful. Of course this was a placebo effect as the medication takes up to 2 weeks to work. Over the next day or so, the placebo effect wore off, but a week since starting the medication, I already feel better.

Second reminder to myself, to not mess with medication that work well.

Also, it’s not worth avoiding medication (and for what?) if it works for you and makes you feel better