Tag Archives: lexapro

Anxiety Medication Fail (Yet Again)

One thing that you should know about me is that I don’t seem to be able to learn a lesson. I am writing this just a few weeks after my latest anxiety medication fail.

So, I had a good thing going on with my medications, no problems, good productivity, happy in life. But, I started looking for ways to cheap out. I found a pharmacy which would provide me cheaper versions of the medications I currently take from my hospital.

MedicationBeforeAfter
Escitalopram 10mg (Half Dose)LexaproEsidep
Risperidone 1mg (Half Dose)NeurisRisperidone GPO
Before and after medication

Basically I replaced my expensive medication with cheaper versions, with supposedly the exact same chemical composition, but at 1/4th the price. What could go wrong?

Lots.

Turns out, all medication are not created equal, even if the box says so.

The first night I switched meds, I had awful sleep and woke up the next morning with an altered mental state. I had a work-related argument the night before, so I thought it was related to that.

The second night, too, I slept awful. At this point, I started suspecting the meds, but decided to give it another try.

Luckily, I still had some of my old medication left. So I decided to do a series of experiments

  1. Third night I rolled back Escitalopram to Lexapro – No Joy
  2. Fourth night I rolled back both medications – Much joy
  3. Fifth & Sixth night, I did Esidep + Neuris – Much joy

Hence, I identified that the Risperidone generic version is no good. The next day, I went to the doctor and got my regular medication.

Anxiety Medication Withdrawal Fail
The Culprit

Anxiety Medication Withdrawal Fail-2

To continue the series of posts about my battle with anxiety, I bring the latest medication withdrawal fail story.

As I wrote here, after my last misadventure with SSRIs, I stopped taking them altogether. Since I felt fine for the next few weeks, I assumed that I don’t really need them and forgot all about them since.

PC: Verywellmind

However, ever so slowly, my anxiety started to creep up back on me. There weren’t any drastic symptoms. Just things like worrying too much about work, thinking about work at night or during weekends. Also, the ever present feeling of dread that something will eventually go wrong.

I was very proud of myself for having successfully(?) given up this medication and wanted to prevent another medication withdrawal fails. So I decided to continue without it.

After I spent 3 successive weekends obsessing over work and dreading Monday, I decided I would keep my mind open about resuming the medicine and gave myself 1 month to decide, till my next doctor appointment. I didn’t last 1 month.

Last weekend, after dreading work all Saturday and most of Sunday, I decided to give up and go back on the medication there and then. I called the hospital & requested to see the doctor the same day. Thankfully they were able to put me on the waiting list and I saw the doctor within the hour. He took pity on me and put me back on Lexapro.

After bagging the medication, I immediately felt better. The world looked brighter and life seemed more beautiful. Of course this was a placebo effect as the medication takes up to 2 weeks to work. Over the next day or so, the placebo effect wore off, but a week since starting the medication, I already feel better.

Second reminder to myself, to not mess with medication that work well.

Also, it’s not worth avoiding medication (and for what?) if it works for you and makes you feel better

The Serotonin Misadventure

Recently, I had a misadventure with my serotonin levels. As I posted earlier, I have been on Neuris 1mg- An Antipsychotic & Lexapro 5mg- An SSRI for my Generalized Anxiety Disorder since I moved to Thailand.

Now, the Lexapro, in Thailand costs 15 times what it cost in India. Always one trying to cheap out, on my last doctor’s visit, I asked him if he could prescribe me a cheaper alternative. He prescribed me Fluoxetine 20mg instead and I happily went on my way chalking this up as a win.

After a few days, I started noticing signs of heart palpitations and sweats through the day. I had recently joined a gym so I chalked this up to the workouts. However, the palpitations became worse with time.

It was not until my family left for vacation leaving me alone with my dog at home that the symptoms hit hard.

I was in a state of constant anxiety. My heart felt it was going to burst out of my chest. To make matters worse, I took a Lexapro, too. It really pushed me over the edge and after suffering all day from a constant state of agitation I dumped my dog with the neighbours and went to the ER.

Serotonin Misadventure
Saw many such alerts throughout the day

They said I have Serotonin Syndrome, from an overdose of SSRIs. They shot me up with a sedative and sent me home with a few pills of Ativan. Ah! Bliss!

I slept for 11 hours and woke up the next day feeling much better. Things didn’t go back to normal immediately, but I could feel the improvements over the next few days; all I had to do was not take the SSRIs.

Lesson Learnt : Don’t mess with medication that work, just to cheap out.

PS: On SSRIs, I used to have vivid movie-like dreams. After stopping the SSRIs, the dreams stopped, too.