Category Archives: Rant

Spawn from Hell & Haraamzada

So I was at the mall, sitting on a bench when I come across these two. The kid is almost 2 years old and still sucking on a soother. One look at his face and you are sure he is a Spawn from Hell.
While the Spawn from hell is hanging out with his man-servant, pulling his hair and being a dick in general, his father comes over and screams at the servant “Yaha kya marwa raha hai haraamzade?” (What are you doing here, bastard?) in front of his son.
Haraamzada and Spawn from Hell must both be partially deaf, because the father is shouting at the top of his voice.

Spawn from hell must want something from one of the stores, that his father is in no mood to spend money on, because he immediately lies down face downwards and starts beating his fists on the floor. The father gently kicks him over so that he is face up and cannot beat his fists anymore.
While the parents walk away, the haraamzada servant bends down to pick up the spawn. The spawn shouts “haraamzade” one last time before giving up and resigning to his toy-less fate.

Pathetic Freeloaders

What won’t people do for free stuff? Fisher and Paykel had an exhibition at Ambience Mall, Gurgaon where they had a chef make food using their products. People who sat for the demonstration would get this food for free.

Losers
More Losers

We saw this scene when we reached the mall and after more than an hour later, while walking by, we saw the same group of people sitting there, licking free ice cream. Surprisingly, it was not people from the lower class who were wasting their time for free ice cream, bit rather well to do people. Pathetic. Bonus: Another (or the same) set of losers getting photos clicked in front of Valentine’s day decorations

Types of People

There are people who spend their whole lives doing what they want to do.
Then there are people who spend their whole lives doing what others want them to do.
There’s a third kind, people who spend their whole lives doing what others don’t want them to do.

These are the ones who are the happiest or the saddest.

Don’t touch Priyanka Chopra’s Sphincter

A few years ago, some fans/lovers of Priyanka Chopra told her that she could sing. She immediately took this to heart and teamed up with famous Pop/Rap musicians and released pathetic “singles”, which no one remembers.
Recently some high up executive from the Schmitten chocolate company had the privilege of sleeping with our dear Piggy Chops and had to green light a Television commercial for their erstwhile reputed chocolate company, sung and danced to, by Priyanka Chopra.
Priyanka Chopra being pathetic Priyanka Chopra could only fake her accent so much, as the result of which, the TVC closes with her loudly exclaiming “Don’t you touch my Sphincter!!!”

What in Satan’s name is this?

Well, I was hanging around at a club yesterday, for an office party. Office parties being office parties, I found myself distracted and veered off to the side. Soon, I found my eyes wandering towards the TV. Incidentally, it had MTV on it. I was greeted with this scene

WTF

That is Katy Perry (I think?) with fireworks bursting out of her Bosom. There was no audio (thankfully), so I couldn’t understand what caused her to contract such an ailment, but that seems to be the gist of the song. Please also note that that’s the only place the fireworks seem to be coming from.
I have avoided watching such channels for years, exactly because of such “artists”. Earlier, albums used to sell well because they had good music. These days, it’s all because of such gimmicky videos, synthesized music, skin show and something called “Twerking”.
I feel old.

Tiger fed contaminated meat at Delhi Zoo

White Tiger, Delhi Zoo
A case of Animal cruelty at the New Delhi Zoo surfaced today, when a 20 year old man jumped into the Tiger enclosure and fed himself to the animal.
When the animal refused to eat the disgusting human meat, onlookers pelted the Tiger with stones, until he gave up, ate the human and then threw up immediately.
It is not clear at this point of time how much digestive distress was caused to the otherwise calm/tame animal.
We demand an immediate probe by Maneka Gandhi.

Fuck you Google, and Goodbye

Yes, Google is evil
Yes, Google is evil

I was introduced to Google back in school, when it was just a search engine. Now it has its fingers and feet in almost every product/service category and is undoubtedly the market leader in most of them.
After Google search, I started using Gmail, then Google Chrome. It was only by chance that I didn’t buy an Android handset (almost bought the T-Mobile G1 once) and I am glad I didn’t. Google is evil. Google is at the moment, what Microsoft was in the 90s. Ruthless and evil.
Google has the right to read through your e-mail, use that information however it pleases and targets ads depending on the text in your e-mail. Also Google has deliberately not supported Windows Phone for years.
Yes, Google is evil
So a few months ago, I decided to say “fuck you” to Google and start moving away from all Google products. OneDrive replaced Google drive. Outlook.com replaced Gmail (it was a pain changing my e-mail address everywhere) and today, as the final step, I migrated my blog from Blogger to WordPress and deleted everything on Blogger.
Bye Bye Google, I am never coming back.

Bad phase

I am going through a bad phase in life. It is as if my body is failing me.

I have gastro-intestinal problems since the last 2 years. I have undergone a battery of tests but have failed to get perfectly well. It is not a constant problem but comes and goes. I suspect that I am Lactose intolerant, so have decided to go on a completely Lactose free diet for the next 2 weeks. If that cures me, well and good. I have no issues giving up milk for the rest of my life. Lactase-enzyme supplements are easily available which when taken with Lactose-containing products prevents symptoms from appearing.

However, the internet is a scary place. When I search for my symptoms, I get a barrage of deadly and dangerous diseases starting with IBS and ending with intestinal cancer. Scariest is the possibility of Coeliac Disease. It has symptoms of Lactase intolerance as well as Gluten-intolerance. If that is the case, I will need to have a Gluten-free diet for the rest of my life, which will mean giving up on Wheat and almost every type of grain. With food being on of the biggest motivations in life, can I completely give up grains of all kind? I am not sure if such a life would be worth living.

I have decided to try a Lactose free diet for a week, failing which I will go see a doctor (again) and go through so many tests (again).

Meanwhile, my motivational factor is at an all time low and I feel depressed and discouraged to do anything productive, especially before the festive season is about to start.

The Pathetic State of Education in India

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Courtesy: http://asiancorrespondent.com

Growing up, I have witnessed a few things which have made me question the quality of education in this country; especially Primary and Secondary education.

In short, schools in India generally suck. They are more profit-making machines rather than a place to impart quality education to students. Moreover, the quality of teachers, especially in the Primary and Secondary education scene is very low.

I have studied in almost 9 schools from Class I to Class XII. I can say without doubt that most teachers did not teach for the joy of teaching, but rather to earn money. There’s no harm in that, apart from the fact that they are still expected to be good at their jobs; which mostly they are not.

One subject which I have seen teachers mostly suck at, is English. Apart from 2 teachers in my entire school life, none of the English teachers I have come across were good at their jobs. I have found myself arguing with my English teachers many times when I have felt that what they were saying is wrong. After a while, I realized that arguing is no use, as the teachers here, far from being open minded and appreciating feedback actually had huge egoes, which I hurt when I corrected them.

Unlike subjects like Science and Maths, if you learn languages incorrectly at a young age, you are unlikely to improve later on; you’ll be stuck with it for life. If there’s one teacher who doesn’t know proper English teaching a class of 50, he/she will produce 50 people who don’t know proper English later on in life.

This problem is not isolated to English/Hindi and other language subjects. Most teachers don’t know what they are doing and write things on the blackboard directly from the textbook or old notes and expect their students not to question what they are writing.

Also, I have recently seen students being told to take off their shoes outside the computer room, as their shoes might have “viruses” which would infect the computers. Also, a textbook as recent as 2010 still listed Pluto as a planet.

Why is the state of Education here so bad, when considering that the schooling here is much more expensive than the developed countries? The answer is “Jugaad”.

Indians have a long standing habit of relying on “Jugaad”, which is simply a way to get something done using means other than those which are proper. Mostly this would involve a monetary transaction, or pulling strings with someone high up in the system.

I have seen people I know graduate from full time B.Ed courses without attending a single class. These same people get jobs at nice schools using the same “Jugaad” technique; when it is clear that no self-respecting interviewer would have even interviewed them for more than 5 minutes. Also, these people don’t know basic English.

All this is very frustrating and makes me very angry; especially because I don’t know what I can do about it.