Tag Archives: Irritable Bowel Syndrome

Movies

Moonfall

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Another Roland Emmerich disaster movie. When I saw the trailer for Moonfall a few years ago, I just burst out laughing at the premise. I didn’t think I would ever see it. But another boring Sunday at home changed my mind.

Independence Day was a really good movie; one of the few disaster movies done really well. Since then, the offerings from Roland Emmerich have really gone downhill.

Moonfall
Moonfall

Although the premise of Moonfal is new, the rest of the movie is the same as any other Roland Emmerich movie.

The movie starts with the protagonist, an astronaut who comes in contact with extraterrestrial technology while in space, but no one believes him. Fast forward a few years, he is now washed up and has separated from his wife. Surprisingly similar to David from Independence Day.

The other main character is an anxiety-ridden, IBS rocking conspiracy theorist one step away from a panic attack. He is always trying to convince people about his theories. He, too, ends up like David, running around with some computer printouts with data needed to convince people. The conspiracy theorist is also a fanboy of Space X and keeps saying “I love Elon”.

Same Tired Formula

The rest of the movie is entirely predictable. Same scenes of chaos and looting. People trying to get out of cities, while the moon falls to earth. The government orders mass evacuation. To where? All this talk about getting to safety. Which place on earth will save you from the moon colliding with earth?

When the government finds out that the moon is out of orbit what do they do? Go to the moon to investigate. A mission is organised and launched within days. Laughable.

Another scene of government retrieving someone to help them with “We need you to come with us, now”.

Also laughable is how they take a graffiti-ed space shuttle from a museum, prep it within days and launch with the crew being decided at the last minute.

The movie is also full of shameless advertisement of Kaspersky. Even the space shuttle systems have Kaspersky antivirus installed.

The only thing good about the movie is the VFX. The scenes of destruction are impressive. The shots from inside the moon are breath taking. Halle Berry’s acting is piss-poor.

Overall, I don’t understand why producers keep financing Roland Emmerich when he has nothing new to offer.

Health & Fitness, Rant

A Note on Mental Health

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I have documented my struggles with mental health on this blog before. Considering the focus of the media on the mental health of famous people these days, I decided to write a longer rant about my own struggles.

PC: Burnley Together

During my college days I was a happy-go-lucky kind of guy. Although I did get depressed once in a while, I was never-ever worried about things. After college, while working a job I didn’t like, I also went through bouts of depression, but got over it quickly once I found a better job.

My second job was the best job, mentally, of my career. I had friends at work, I enjoyed what I was doing and I never even thought about work outside office. It was a shift-job where you could switch off completely after work.

It was in 2012 that I realized something was wrong. I suffered from IBS for almost 2 years. During this time I also turned lactose intolerant. I did read about the close connection between the gut and the brain, but I couldn’t figure out which affected which. After 2 years, I suddenly got better and didn’t think about it again.

Things started to go south again around 2016-17, when I wasn’t able to handle non-stresses from my work. I would lay awake at night thinking about trivial things from work, lost weight rapidly and couldn’t concentrate on non-work things. I tried things like meditation and mindfulness but nothing helped much. The mind just won’t stop racing and over-thinking.

This was the first time I decided to go see a shrink, at a hospital. I was hoping for a quick solution to all my troubles, but she prescribed me with very-expensive counselling sessions. The cost of the sessions made my issues worse, so I never went back. Thankfully, the shrink did give me a diagnosis, that of Generalized Anxiety Disorder. Eventually, this phase also passed and I forgot all about it.

I switched jobs again in 2020 and this time anxiety came back to attack me with a vengeance. It was clear that this time it was worse than before. It was so bad that I couldn’t sleep for more than 3 hours for a week straight. Sleeping aids didn’t help either.

Eventually, I decided to go to another shrink. This one was in a busy market popular with people I knew. I was ashamed to go see him. This doctor also confirmed the diagnosis of GAD and decided to prescribe me medications immediately. Within a few days, I was feeling much better. Although anxiety never went away completely, it is now quite under control, thankfully, to this day.

What I do

I use the following techniques to keep my anxiety under control

  1. Medication, which I am slowly weaning myself off of.
  2. Exercise – Even a short run helps a lot. Even walking is better than nothing.
  3. Listen to music I love everyday, without fail.
  4. Writing (Blogging)
  5. Whenever I have too many thoughts at night, I write them on a piece of paper before I go to bed. Next day I action all the items on that piece of paper and then tear it away. I found this strangely therapeutic.
  6. Stay as far away from Social Networks as possible.

I know many people have found relief with mindfulness, but for me it tended to make things worse. Maybe I was not using the tool correctly.

The Rich

On the news, I repeatedly hear stories about the struggle of famous people with mental health, especially sportspersons. Although I am happy that they are raising more awareness for mental health, the impact of mental illnesses on them is much different than it is on regular people like us.

For them, quitting means an outpouring of support and being called “brave”. For people like me, quitting would mean being called a failure, losing my house and not being able to feed my family. So no, I don’t think these sportspersons are brave for quitting. They quit because they are filthy rich & can afford to.

Not everyone can.

Health & Fitness, Rant

Bad phase

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I am going through a bad phase in life. It is as if my body is failing me.

I have gastro-intestinal problems since the last 2 years. I have undergone a battery of tests but have failed to get perfectly well. It is not a constant problem but comes and goes. I suspect that I am Lactose intolerant, so have decided to go on a completely Lactose free diet for the next 2 weeks. If that cures me, well and good. I have no issues giving up milk for the rest of my life. Lactase-enzyme supplements are easily available which when taken with Lactose-containing products prevents symptoms from appearing.

However, the internet is a scary place. When I search for my symptoms, I get a barrage of deadly and dangerous diseases starting with IBS and ending with intestinal cancer. Scariest is the possibility of Coeliac Disease. It has symptoms of Lactase intolerance as well as Gluten-intolerance. If that is the case, I will need to have a Gluten-free diet for the rest of my life, which will mean giving up on Wheat and almost every type of grain. With food being on of the biggest motivations in life, can I completely give up grains of all kind? I am not sure if such a life would be worth living.

I have decided to try a Lactose free diet for a week, failing which I will go see a doctor (again) and go through so many tests (again).

Meanwhile, my motivational factor is at an all time low and I feel depressed and discouraged to do anything productive, especially before the festive season is about to start.