Actually, no one told me anything about being bald, because I didn’t have bald friends to consult with. Below are the things that came as a surprise as part of the bald life
I am sub-consciously running my hand over my scalp all day. However, I don’t think this will last long.
I need to shave my head every 2/3 days max. If I go longer, the shaver can’t catch the hair. I had planned to shave once a week, but had to re-think my strategy.
It took me many days to learn how to shave correctly. The first week was full of bruises and blood and missed patches.
The money I was saving from not buying Shampoo and Minoxidil, I am now spending on shaving gel and aftershave.
Shaving the head feels like a novelty at first, but starts feeling like a chore after a few days.
The balder requires weekly maintenance/lubrication.
There’s an unspoken solidarity between hairless men on the street. A subtle head-nod is not uncommon. I have even received welcomes from bald men I knew already.
The head feels unprotected, especially during activities like running. It feels like if I fall, the head will crack open like a watermelon.
Sunburn on the scalp is real. So now, instead of Minoxidil dripping down my face while running, it is sunscreen.
My parents have taken this worse than I had foreseen.
Overall, staying bald seems to require more work than maintaining hair. However, bald is better than blading, any day.
My relationship with my hair (The ones on my head i.e.) has been rocky to say the least. I had mentioned before, that I hate haircuts. Experiencing hair loss for quite a few years, I had made up my mind that I will not end up like Pathetic Fool 6. In the beginning of the year, I had decided that I would exit with dignity, and that time has come.
Bye Bye Hair!
Few days ago, I made the leap and shaved all the hair off my head, for good. This was a moment I had been dreading for years, but surprisingly, the act ended up being liberating beyond measure. I can think of the following ways it has improved my life
No need to comb anymore. One less thing to keep.
No need to apply Minoxidil anymore. Further saving of money, no more low blood pressure.
No need to wait for the tresses to dry after a shower.
No need to worry about hiding the slowly-expanding bald-spot on the top of my head.
Haircuts are now a thing of the past. It is so liberating to shave my own head without having to speak to someone or going somewhere. Further saving of money.
No need to wear a cap while swimming.
No need to worry that wearing a helmet will squash my hair flat. Plus points for safety.
No need to worry that getting wet in the rain will squash my hair flat. The rain drops just roll right off.
Hair not getting in my eyes anymore.
No bad hair days.
No need to buy and track shampoo anymore. Further saving of money.
All in all, this was one of the best changes I made to my life and there’s no looking back.
One thing I noticed when I moved to Thailand, was the ever-present logo of Pornhub everywhere. Mostly in the form of stickers, affixed to motorcycles, cars & even backpacks. I assumed people just liked it and didn’t think too much of it.
Pornhub logo sticker on the back of a scooter
Last weekend while travelling in BTS, I saw the logo, of all places, on a kid’s T-Shirt.
Child wearing T-Shirt with Pornhub & Durex logosChild wearing T-Shirt with Pornhub logo
On the other arm, the kid has a Durex logo and in the front the logo of the beer Chang. I really didn’t understand why anyone would dress up their kid like this, so I started digging around on the interwebs.
However, considering how people are dressing up their kids in this and how “porn” is a popular syllable in last names here, I am pretty sure most Thais don’t even know what that website is and what they are endorsing.
Not much unlike the presence of Nazi insignia everywhere in the country.
When I was young, I was somewhat of an early adopter. Especially for new technologies and products. However, being an early adopter comes with some glaring disadvantages. In this post, I will write about how I got burnt many times throughout my life.
Early Adopters
1. Nickel Cadmium rechargeable batteries
When I was growing up, I had many toys. Lots of them. Most of these toys were electronic and it was a pain asking parents to buy me batteries when they ran out. So when rechargeable Ni-Cd batteries were introduced, I was all over them. I convinced my parents to buy me some batteries and a charger. However, there were some major disadvantages.
The batteries got extremely hot while charging – I had a few melt down over the years
They produced only 1.2V instead of the 1.5V of regular batteries and some gadgets didn’t like that.
Eventually, they never caught on and I had to go back to regular batteries.
2. Hero Ranger Bicycle with shock absorbers
When we moved to Chandigarh, I was confronted with kids showing off everywhere. The cool kids rode fancy bicycles and the legendary kids already rode scooters and motorcycles at age 14. I started feeling real inadequate about my regular bicycle and asked my parents for a newer one. They asked me to chose between a bicycle with shock absorbers and a bicycle with gear shift (Hero Swing, which had both was out of the question). I (foolishly) chose the bicycle with shock absorbers.
For one, the bicycle had shock absorbers only in the front. Each speed bump still felt like a hammer to the tail bone. Secondly, the bicycle was heavy as fuck. It too much more effort to ride it compared to my last one. Also, within a few months, the shock absorbers started squeaking and sagging. There were no mechanics near my place who could fix it. Eventually, within a couple of years, the shock absorbers bottomed out completely. What a waste!
3. Royal Enfield Thunderbird (First edition)
This was my first bike and the only bike I loved. I bought it when it was just released. One highlight was that it came with an all new aluminium AVL engine. It was supposed to be lighter and more efficient (it was both). However, the engine was terribly unrefined compared to the traditional Royal Enfield engines. The main problem was that its tappets made a lot of noise and the pushrods needed constant adjustment. This continued to bother me till the time the bike got stolen. The bike also leaked engine oil like a sieve.
Subsequent versions came with self-adjusting pushrods and much better oil seals.
4. Nokia Lumia 900
Nokia Lumia 900, not mine
I remember when I first saw the keynote for Windows Phone 7. I was blown away by how beautiful the OS looked and how smooth everything worked. As soon as I could, I bought a Lumia 900. However, the OS was still in its infancy and although polished, lacked a good app ecosystem. Even worse, the Lumia 900 got no major OS upgrades and the phone was obsolete within a year.
5. Reliance Infocomm CDMA phone
Reliance LG RD2030, not mine
I was a super early adopter of Reliance’s CDMA phones. Like I got one within a few weeks of their network launching. My first CDMA phone was also my first phone ever, the LG RD2030. Only 1 other person I knew had a CDMA phone. We felt like pioneers. However, the experience was shitty.
The phone became very hot when making calls or accessing the internet.
The battery life was abysmal.
The charger was a dock-type and it was impossible to use the phone while charging.
The display was grayscale with a blue backlight.
Your number changed every time you roamed into a new state.
When the CDMA network launched, it was marketed as a “Wireless Land Line” and all CDMA phones had a landline-like number with an STD code. In a couple of years, the government made that illegal and everyone had to deal with a number change without warning.
Reliance solved most of these issues after a few years, but CDMA never caught on and died a painful death.
6. Surface Pro 3
Microsoft Surface Pro 3, not mine
It is a testament to Microsoft’s shitty product quality that even a 3rd generation product provided an early adopter experience. The Surface Pro 3 was a gift from a fiend. It was a top of the line model but was the epitome of unrefinement
The chassis got very hot and led to CPU throttling. The CPU couldn’t burst for more than a few seconds at a time.
The fan whirred all the time and was very loud.
The fan still didn’t provide sufficient cooling and I had to carry around an external fan to cool it.
It didn’t go to sleep every time the lid was closed and led to it discharging in the bag.
The pen randomly stopped working without warning.
I am sure if I were still in India, I would have been tempted to get an EV and consequently suffered again.
Last few months have been very difficult. I have spent most of them doing documentation and it will be the death of me. I am not sure how it happened, but I got stuck with documentation of various kinds all within a span of few weeks. Tangled in the web of Indian government bureaucracy.
Below, I will try to show how complicated the various documentations were. Dependency of one document on another and on another, nested up to 4 levels deep
Daughter and my Visa/Work Permit extension
This is what started my death by documentation. Although the company handles most of the paperwork, I need to visit the Indian embassy and get a relationship certificate every year
Passport copy
Visa Copy
Work Permit Copy
Birth certificate
Relationship certificate from Indian embassy
Axis/Indian Bank NRO Conversion (In Person)
I got these bank accounts converted to NRO in-person when I visited Gurgaon and Kolkata.
This one was relatively painless, but they rejected my application for the first time and I had to gather all the documents again and send them to India a second time
This was the most difficult. Many of the documents had dependencies and sub-dependencies and it took me weeks of effort and a lot of money to gather everything.
NRI Account opening form (22 pages)
Demat Debit and Pledge Instruction (DDPI)
FATCA Declaration
PO Box Declaration
FEMA Declaration
Passport Size photo
Client details and declaration form
Copy of Passport
Attested by Indian Embassy
Visa
Copy of PAN Card
Attested by Indian Embassy
Overseas Address Proof (Thai Driving License)
Attested by Indian Embassy
Attested by Thai Ministry of Foreign Affairs
Translated by a certified agency
Indian Address Proof (Indian Driving License)
Attested by Indian Embassy
Cancelled cheque for NRO account
ID Proof of Nominee
State Bank of India NRO conversion (Remote)
For this one, I shot an arrow in the dark. I just checked the documents online, filled the form and sent it by post without asking them. Still don’t know if the documents have been accepted or if it was all in vain
NRO conversion form
Copy of Passport
Attested by Indian Embassy
Visa
Copy of PAN Card
Attested by Indian Embassy
Overseas Address Proof (Thai Driving License)
Attested by Indian Embassy
Attested by Thai Ministry of Foreign Affairs
Translated by a certified agency
Indian Address Proof (Indian Driving License)
Attested by Indian Embassy
Thai Tax ID (Self attested)
Salary Slips
Thai bank statements
Daughter’s Passport Renewal
This one was surprisingly easy and went through the first time. I was apprehensive daughter’s signatures will not match, but she did surprisingly well.
Passport Application form (Generated Online)
Photos (They first asked for 2, so I got 2. Then they asked for 3, so I had to get 4 more. Then they took only 2)
Old passport
Visa copy
Declaration for minor
Registration form for Indians staying abroad
Parents’ passport copies
Parents’ work permit copies
Thai Driving License Renewal
I can’t blame this one on the Indian government, though. I contacted an agency for this service and it was not too difficult.
Driving License application form
Photos
Passport copy
Visa copy
Work Permit copy
Address proof
Residence certificate from Indian embassy
Daughter’s Visa transfer
Since I re-issued my daughter’s passport mid-way through her Visa, now I need to get the Visa transferred to the new passport
New Passport
Old Passport
Father’s passport
Father’s work permit
Letter from embassy informing about re-issue of passport
Relationship certificate with new Passport number
And it is still not over, have a few more to do. I went through 2 cartridges for my printer already. I am sick and tired of this.
After a long time, a movie post. I won’t say I was a big MCU fan, ever. I did follow the movies in the Infinity Saga as they were entertaining. Wholesome superhero movies. 1-2 movies a year; I could easily handle that. I do remember waiting (not too excitedly) for Endgame, which I went to see with my nephew. Epic battle, many people die but the good guys win.
MCU: Avengers Endgame
I wish Disney had left the MCU at that. But no, like a true corporate giant, they wanted to milk the MCU for whatever it was worth. And in the process, they ruined it.
They began Phase 4 with renewed energy. Movies, TV shows what not! I tried my best to keep up, I did.
My Effort
Even though I found WandaVision average, I finished all the episodes. I needed to keep in sync with the story, I said to myself or I will lose the plot. Shang-Chi was below average but I still saw it. The Falcon and the Winter soldier was below average. I could only watch a few episodes. Eternals was so shit, I didn’t watch it altogether. Spider-man No Way Home was good, but I felt the movie relied too much on the re-appearance of the older spideys to carry the movie. Loki was average. Multiverse of madness was a super bore. I couldn’t stand the Scarlett Witch. Hawkeye was average. Love and Thunder was surprisingly bad, especially coming from Taika Waititi.
But my MCU journey ended with Ms Marvel. I started watching it thinking there’s finally a superhero from the Indian sub-continent but it was such a drag, I gave up on the entire MCU after a few episodes.
Frankly speaking, Disney is putting out too much content and most of it is not up to the mark. If one watches only a few select movies, they will lose the plot quickly because important events happen in the TV shows, too.
Eventually, I realised I don’t have the willpower or the time to follow the MCU anymore and have given up on it. I may not even watch the upcoming Guardians of the Galaxy movie.
Taking my series further, here’s Pathetic Fool 6 from Bangkok.
Of all the places, this one works in my own company. And is an Indian to boot, adding to my shame.
Has lost almost all of his hair but has still tried to salvage the situation by doing this very pathetic comb over. Why people just don’t shave their heads before reaching this stage is beyond me.
Bonus points for that fancy orange loop to hang his mask from his neck.
I am not one for New Year’s resolutions. Never made them. However, recently I have been quite unhappy with how some aspects of my life have been going. So I decided to make some changes. And now seems like a good time to start as any. So here are my New Year’s Resolutions for 2023. Nothing too ambitious
I will try my best to cut down on my Anxiety medication. No set targets, no time bindings, will just do my best without being miserable and see how it goes.
I will stop wasting money this year. I will spend money as much as I want, within my means, but will stop wasting like here and here. I have made a comprehensive list of the mistakes and lessons learnt from last year. I will also try to start saving some money. No set goals.
I will not consume alcohol except when the occasion calls for it. Not mindlessly when I am getting bored and have nothing else to do.
I will listen to music more. Will give new music a chance.
I will shave my head for good once I get a SIM card replacement and spend 0 effort or money on my hair. Finished.
I will take less sick leaves.
I will be more grateful for what I have in life.
I will cut toxic people out of my life.
I will start reading books again. Again, no set target. Will read as much as I enjoy.
I will lower my time on Social Networks – especially Quora and Reddit. Will replace the time mindlessly scrolling these apps with book reading. Will lower my screen time.
I will close the rings on my watch at least 6 days a week. Will run at least 4 days a week.
I will call my parents, especially my father more.
Let’s see how many I can actually go through with.
It is somewhat shocking, the rate at which Cannabis stores have popped up in Bangkok, ever since the legalisation. Seemingly overnight. Suddenly I am surrounded by more Cannabis stores than 7 Elevens.
Below are some that I see on a regular basis that I found creative.
This is the one closest to my home. This started out as a small nook above a donut shop, but they eventually bought the property next door for their own place.
High Society Cannabis StoreHigh Society Cannabis Store
This is my favourite. It has no pretensions about what it is selling. Everything is clearly labelled.
Wonder Land
As per Google, there are 241 cannabis stores in Sukhumvit area alone. Thais are extremely shy about smoking up, so it remains to be seen how long all these stores last on expat business alone.
Following up on articles on how to be a Tamil, Gurgaon-ite and a Delhi-ite, this one is about how to be an Assamese. Information gleaned from observing many friends from that region.
Wear a goatee.
Listen to heavy metal music.
If you can, grow long hair.
Smoke weed all the time.
Say “Maksudai” and “Kela” to address incidents you don’t agree with.
Go to study engineering/architecture outside Assam and pick fights with groups of Biharis and UP bhaiyas.
